NGO RPF hybrid
by NGOfan2014
Summary: I really couldn't think of a decent title. Ifrost asked me to write a story where real Lee Mack meets fictional Lucy Adams. I've never wanted to write RPF but was intrigued by the hybrid idea so decided to give it this a go. This will be a multi chapter story, spanning 20 years through a present day conversation and flashbacks. I don't own character of Lucy or the real Lee Mack.
1. Chapter 1

**I was asked by Ifrost to write a RPF/ NGO hybrid fiction, which features the 'real' Lee Mack and the fictional Lucy Adams. I've never written a RPF before and haven't particularly wanted to but I said I'd give it a go. It's taken me a while to start writing as I wasn't sure how where to start or where to go with it, and I've had other requests I've been working on, but it's now finally taking shape. The story is in the form of Lucy reminiscing with her friend and flashbacks of different points in her and Lee's relationship.**

 **In this story the age gap between Lee and Lucy is less than in real life and I will be playing with timelines a bit. The story will probably span quite a few years and the progression of Lee's career (as requested) but please forgive me as there will inevitably be inaccuracies in terms of the order events (call it poetic licence if you will) - these may or may not be intentional. I think I've got the years Lee was at university slightly wrong but it fitted better in the story. I have tried to stick to the general timeline of events in Lee's career though. I have decided that in this story there is no Tara, as I don't want to portray Lee as some sort of love rat who cheats on her. Since this is so different from anything I've written before I'd particularly appreciate any reviews or PMs.**

 **One more disclaimer: Apart from the events in his career (researched through reading his book and interviews), my depiction of Lee in this story is fictional. I don't know him and have never met him (sadly) so my portrayal of his personality and behaviour is largely the product of my imagination. I doubt I've done him justice but I tried.**

 **January 2015. The McKillop house, near Hampton Court, Surrey.**

Lucy McKillop was enjoying an evening with Ellie, who had recently moved in a couple of houses down the street. Ellie's children went to the same school as Lucy's, and she'd proved to be a godsend when at the start of December, with her husband still away on tour, Lucy had come down with sickness and couldn't do the school run.

Ellie was fast becoming a best friend, and since Lee had been home, they'd met up as couples once or twice, along with Ellie's husband Steve. Tonight was the first time Lucy and Ellie had shared a proper girly night in, as for the first time since Lee had finished his tour, he was out filming an episode of a panel show.

As much as Ellie was great company, Lucy would rather have spent this evening with Lee, as there'd been too many evenings without him recently. Of course she had friends and the children for company, but she always missed Lee desperately when he was away. Still, she was used to evenings alone by now. That's what happened when you married a comedian, being a comedy widow for several months at a time every few years was part of the territory. It was a small price to pay though, for being married to such a funny and kind and talented man.

Lucy's phone beeped suddenly, grabbing her attention. It was a text message, from Lee.

'Happy Anniversary, Love. I'll be home soon, wait up xxx'.

The message made Lucy smile widely, and she quickly typed her reply. She always looked forward to Lee coming home, but tonight his return couldn't come soon enough, as she had some important news for him.

She hadn't really expected him to remember the anniversary. He was so busy at the moment, in the middle of talks with the BBC and the powers that be about a possible Christmas special of his sitcom. Then there was some charity stuff he was involved in, and of course the writing. Lee was almost always writing new scripts and jokes, constantly on the look out for inspiration, everything a potential subject for material. He'd said he would take a break after the tour, but after only a couple of weeks he was grafting again. Lucy wasn't surprised, Lee had a strong work ethic and he loved his job. He didn't even regard it as a job a lot of the time. Making people laugh was just what he did, it was in his nature, and the fact he got paid for was just a bonus.

" _Message from Lee?_

 _"Yeah, wishing me happy anniversary"_

 _"You got married in January?_

 _"No, it's not our wedding anniversary, it's actually the anniversary of the day we first met. Twenty years today"_

 _"Wow, you both remember that? Steve even forgot my birthday this year. Did you say twenty years? Were you together for ten years then, before you got married?"_

 _"Well, for the first seven years it was sort of on/off. It was a bit complicated"._

 _"How did you and Lee meet? Was he already famous by then?"_

Lucy chuckled a little then. She and Lee always struggled with the idea he was 'famous'. Of course, Lee in his working life resided in a world of 'celebrity', and this world did cross over into his family life at times. He got recognised, approached by fans. He didn't mind this, he always made a point of stopping for a quick chat, signing autographs, posing for a selfie. He'd met the queen, and hundreds of famous people, and he had friends from that world, Tim, Sean, Rob, David and others. But he liked to separate his work and home life as much as he could, that's partly why he didn't use his real surname in his comedy career.

" _No, when we met he was just starting out in comedy..."_


	2. Chapter 2

**Flashback. 1995. Friday night at a pub comedy night near Brunel University, London.**

Lucy was with two friends at the Kings Arms pub. They were regulars at the pub's popular comedy night, which featured a selection of comedians every couple of weeks. Occasionally, some more established names even went there to try out new material. The evenings were always a great laugh, even when there was a comedian who 'died on their arse'. This week had been an open mic night, which were always hit and miss, but several of the comedians had been surprisingly good. A man called Lee in particular.

Tonight's comedy over, the girls finished their drinks before leaving to make the short bus ride to the Halls of residence where they lived. They always liked to review the comedians on their journey home.

" _Who did you think was the funniest tonight Lucy?"_

 _"I liked Lee, he was hilarious"_

 _"Yeah, I agree"._

 _"I thought he was quite cute as well"._

 _"Ooh, Lucy's got a crush! You know he's a student at Brunel too right?"_

 _"Really? How do you know that, have you met him?"_

 _"My friend Sarah knows someone who goes out with his flat mate. I've not met him but when I told her we were going to the comedy night she told me about him, said he might be there. She said he was really funny"._

 _"Oh, he looks a bit older, I assume he's a mature student?"._

 _"Yes, I think he must be. You know what, I've been invited to a house party next weekend, I think he'll probably be there, why don't you come along, you might get to meet him"._

" _I can't just turn up uninvited", Lucy knew she shouldn't have mentioned she found Lee cute, her friends were always trying to set her up. They couldn't understand why she was still single, but the truth was she just hadn't found anyone she liked enough yet to go out with._

 _"They won't mind me bringing you, they probably won't even notice an extra person. And you are very well behaved"._

Lucy nodded and smiled weakly. Even if she did meet Lee, he probably wouldn't be interested in a shy first year Business Management student.

...

 **The following weekend...**

Lucy and Emma walked into the living room of the student house. The party was already in full swing, the house packed full of people. Lucy looked around, but couldn't see anyone else she knew. A tall, dark haired girl approached them.

 _"Hi Emma, and you must be Lucy. Welcome to the mad house. Sarah mentioned that you'd be coming. I'm Chloe by the way. Have a Bacardi Breezer", the girl handed Emma and Lucy a bottle each as she spoke._

 _"Thanks"._

 _"Lucy here would really like to meet Lee. She was very impressed by his...comedy the other night. Is he here?"_

 _"Emma! I can't believe you just...", Lucy felt her cheeks turn bright red._

 _"He's at work, but he'll be here later. If you want to meet him I can make that happen. I'll introduce you both then make some sort of excuse to take Emma away"._

 _Lucy turned and glared at her friend. This could be really embarrassing. She never really knew what to say to men she fancied._

 _"I don't suppose he'll be interested in talking to me"_

 _"He'll talk to anyone, he likes people. And why wouldn't he want to talk to you? You're really pretty and you seem very sweet. He's really nice and has lots of stories to tell. He's funny and he's charming, but he's 'll like him"._

 _"Okay but don't make it obvious what you're trying to do. That would just be embarrassing"._

 _"Don't worry, subtle's my middle name", with that Chloe turned, walked away and immediately tripped over an empty bottle in the middle of the floor, prompting cheering and clapping from the rest of the revellers._

 _..._

Lucy and Emma were chatting in the kitchen when Chloe came in.

 _"Hi again, I've been looking for you. Lee's arrived home, if you still want to meet him..."._

 _"Oh I'm not sure I..."_

 _"Come on, where's the harm? We've been trying to find Lee a girlfriend for a while. There's been a couple of dodgy ones, and it's about time he found someone nice. Come on, don't look so nervous, just smile and be yourself and he'll like you I'm sure"._

I must remind myself never to make the mistake of saying someone is cute in front of Emma again, thought Lucy. She felt like she was about to go on a blind date, only with someone who didn't know that was the plan, and in a crowded room.

Back in the living room, Lucy spotted Lee sitting on one of the sofas. Her and Emma followed Chloe, who proceeded to go and sit down next to him.

 _"Hi Chloe, you alright?"_

 _"I'm fine thanks, you?"_

 _"Yeah, tired coz I just got in from a shift at WH Smith. Not sure how long I can stick it out there for to be honest"_

 _"Oh, that bad?"_

 _"It's not great, but it's a job. Can we change the subject though, the place depresses me"_

 _"Sorry, I'm being rude, this is Lucy and Emma. They're both big comedy fans. Right well I'm going to get more drinks...see you in a bit"._

 _"Nice to meet you, Lucy and Emma, I'm Lee"._

 _"We knew that, we saw you at the King's Arms comedy night the other day"_ , Emma announced.

" _Yes, we thought you were very funny_ ", added Lucy.

 _"Phew, thank god for that, otherwise that would have been an awkward start to the conversation"._

 _"Lucy said you were the funniest act she'd seen for ages"._

Lucy felt her face flush, even more so when she saw Lee was now blushing.

" _Thank you Lucy, that's very kind of you to say"._

 _"It's true, she was pissing herself the whole time. And I was"_

 _"Oh well, good...not literally I hope?"._

 _"No, I'm not incontinent, full bladder control here...", Lucy's face fell as soon as she finished her sentence. She was joking, but feared it didn't sound as funny out loud as it did in her head. Never try and make a joke in front of a person who's funnier than you, she thought. Why did she always have to say stupid things when she was talking to men she liked?_

Lee chuckled, " _Well that's good to know, though people of all levels of continency are welcome to come and watch me. I'm an equal opportunities comedian_ ", there was a playful twinkle in Lee's eyes as he spoke.

Lucy laughed then, relaxing a bit. Lee smiled as he watched her giggle, dimples forming at the corners of her mouth. Lucy was beautiful, and she seemed slightly shy and tongue tied, which he found endearing. Plus, she liked comedy, so she had the all important sense of humour.

The three continued to make small talk until Chloe reappeared,

" _Emma, I need to borrow you"_

 _"Oh, I was just talking to..."_

 _"It's a bit of an emergency I'm afraid"._

Lucy tried not to react as she saw Chloe wink at Emma. She prayed Lee had not noticed the overacting. Subtlety was clearly not Chloe's strong point.

 _"Oh, what's happened?"_

 _"Sarah needs you. She's having boy trouble, she's locked herself in the bathroom"._

 _"You don't mind do you Lucy, if I leave you here with Lee for a bit?"_

Lucy shook her head, though they didn't wait for her to answer, instead walking off out of the living room. She wasn't sure what to say now, she felt a bit self-conscious all of a sudden, then Lee broke the silence,

 _"Lucy, how do you know Chloe then?"_

 _"I don't really, I only met her tonight. She's the friend of a friend of a friend, if that makes sense"._

 _"I think so"._

 _"Do you live here, in this house I mean, not the general area?"_

 _"Yep, with two girls, Hannah and Olivia"._

 _"Oh right, I thought Emma said Chloe was going out with one of your flatmates?"_

 _"She is, Olivia. Chloe's gay"._

 _"Oh I see. So Hannah, is she?"_

" _No, Hannah's straight"_

 _"I didn't mean is Hannah gay too, I meant... is Hannah your girlfriend?"_

Lucy saw Lee smirk slightly. She couldn't believe she'd come straight out with that.

" _No, we're just friends. I'm single. What about you, are you...with anyone?"_

 _"Nope, I'm single too"._

Lee was surprised how happy he was to hear that. He'd only just met Lucy but there was something about her, he wanted to get to know her more. He wasn't sure what to say next, so he just nodded and smiled.

Lucy, worried she'd made Lee feel uncomfortable, decided to change the subject.

" _Anyway, I understand you're a student at Brunel as well, what course are you doing?"_

 _"Drama. I'm in my final year"._

 _"Do you want to be an actor then, or work behind the scenes?"_

 _"No, I want to be a comedian, full time. I know that probably sounds unrealistic. A lot of people when I tell them react like I've just said I wanted to be an astronaut or something. But it's my dream"._

 _"You're really funny, you know how to entertain the crowd so I don't see why you can't achieve your dream, if you set your mind to it"_

To hear Lucy's reaction was something of a breath of fresh air to Lee. He was used to people, especially women, being far less encouraging. Normally they would say things like, 'but comedy's not a proper job is it?'

" _Thanks Lucy. And thanks for not just laughing at me when I said I wanted to be a comedian. Many before you have done just that. The great thing about this course is we were able to lead a module ourselves and they let me set up my own comedy night, doing stand up myself and booking other acts to perform"._

 _"So drama's not all wearing leotards and pretending to be trees then? I couldn't really imagine you doing that"_

 _"There's been a bit of that, but it's not really me. I've concentrated more on the film and television aspects"._

 _"So in a few years time I might see you on TV doing your comedy?"_

 _"That would be nice, but I'm not sure I'm good enough really. I'd be happy just making a career of playing the comedy clubs. How about you anyway, what are you studying?"_

 _"It's going to sound really boring compared to you, but I'm doing Business Management. I'm only in my first year"._

 _"What made you choose that?"_

" _The truth is I don't know what I want to do but my parents wanted me to go to university. I just figured Business Management was sort of general, you know. Plus, next year I get to spend a year abroad, and I really want to travel. I wasn't allowed to go on a gap year, and we never ventured further than France on family holidays. I've never been anywhere else"._

 _"Travelling's good, I did a bit...spent time in Australia fruit picking and being a hospital receptionist. But, putting off adult life isn't all it's cracked up to be, at least you will have got yourself together by your early twenties. I spent my late teens and early twenties dossing around and doing every low paid job you could imagine"._

So she was right, Lee was quite a bit older than her. And he had life experience. Whilst in a way this drew Lucy to him, it also made her feel a bit naive and innocent. She tried not to show it though, as Lee seemed to be genuinely interested in what she had to say.

 _"I bet you have some interesting stories to tell though. There must be some amusing anecdotes you can use for your comedy"._

 _"True, I've got a few up my sleeve"._

 _"I think you're really brave you know. I don't know how you do it, getting up on stage like you do. Do you get nervous?"_

 _"I don't think I'm brave, it's not like I'm a fireman or something. But I do get nervous, believe me even after I decided I wanted to be a comedian, it took me a long time to pluck up the courage to actually get out there"_

 _"I couldn't tell you were nervous though, when I saw you on stage, you seemed so confident"._

 _"I tend to feel more nervous before I go on stage, once I'm there it's not as bad, don't get me wrong, it doesn't always go so well, I'm still just finding my feet, and some audiences just don't take to you"._

 _"I know, I always feel bad for comedians when I see them struggling on stage"._

 _"Do you go to see a lot of live comedy?"_

" _Yes, I go to comedy clubs and pub open mic nights quite often. Occasionally I go to bigger shows"._

 _"Who have you seen recently, bigger names I mean?"_

 _"I saw Steve Coogan do stand up a few months ago. He was brilliant"_

 _"Yes he is. You know when I first came to London I saw him at the Comedy Store and that's when I finally decided comedy was what I wanted to do as a career"._

 _"How long have you been in London? Did you move down for uni?"_

 _"No I've been here for quite a few years. I moved here as I thought I had more chance of being a successful comedian here, as London's where most of the best comedy clubs are. As I said though I couldn't bring myself to take the first step of doing my first gig, so I just found work wherever I could get it and stayed with various friends until they couldn't put up with me anymore. I once found myself staying in this random woman's flat and I'd come down in the morning and there'd be porn videos all over the living room"._

 _"What?"_

 _"She told me she reviewed porn for a living. I was never completely convinced"_

 _"We're you and her...?"_

 _"Oh God no, she was much older, and a bit weird, to say the least. I just rented a sofa-bed in her spare room. Literally there was just a sofa bed and nothing else. I don't know why I'm telling you all this really, I'm hardly painting a good picture of myself. Still, a least I didn't mention the time I advertised my services as a handyman but all I got were requests to perform sexual favours...mostly from men"._

" _You've just mentioned it_ ", Lucy laughed. " _So did you err...you know...answer the requests?_ ".

" _No. I may have needed the money but not that much. I mean handjobs fair enough but..."_

Lee looked so deadpan for a second that for a second Lucy wasn't sure if he was joking, then he grinned and did that twinkly thing with his eyes that made her smile and blush. Lucy's mind had started to wander to inappropriate places.

" _But you know where to draw the line right?"_

 _"That's right"._

There was a slight pause in the flow of conversation then as Lucy thought about what to say next. Lee broke the silence,

 _"I know you're laughing Lucy but I would like to clarify that I have never been paid to perform sexual favours of any kind...let's face it with a face and body like mine it's more likely to happen the other way around. Not that I would ever pay for...oh you know what I mean"._

This made Lucy melt a little bit. For all his cheeky charm Lee clearly had a less than confident side. And she admired his honesty about his less than ambitious past. Most men she met at university did nothing but show off in order to try and impress women.

" _What's wrong with your face and body? They look alright to me"._

 _"Thank you"._

Lee smiled shyly and his eyes met Lucy's again, and they gazed at each other for a few seconds.

" _Anyway...so...err...I detect a northern accent, where are you from?"_

 _"Southport. I was born there, though we moved around quite a bit because my parents ran pubs. I moved back there when my mum and dad split up though"._

 _"Wow, you lived in pubs? Your childhood sounds like it was a lot more eventful than mine. I grew up in Henley with both parents and my older brother. It was fairly idyllic I suppose. Nothing exciting ever happened. Apart from when we found out our neighbours were holding regular swingers parties, that caused a bit of a local scandal"._

 _"How did you find out?"_

 _"We saw the people arriving one evening, then heard the noises. That's bit awkward believe me when when you're fifteen and sitting eating dinner with your parents"._

 _"I can imagine"._

Lucy blushed again. Lee was grinning cheekily and looking at her in a way that had an unnerving effect on her. She felt the room was suddenly getting very hot. Now might be the time to change the subject.

"Anyway...you said you'd had various jobs, what would you say are the best and worst jobs you've done?"

" _The worst was probably when I was a stable boy?"_

 _"You worked with horses? I used to love horse riding back home"_

 _"Did you? I'd never ridden a horse before but I was watching the horse racing after I got kicked out of college and I had this idea that I could become a jockey. So I immediately rang up the local stables and asked if they had any jobs going"_

 _"Just like that? That's an interesting approach to career planning"_

 _"Yes, just like that. I was quite naive. I thought, how hard can it be? The horse does all the work. I was very wrong of course. Anyway, they signed me up as a stable boy but the first time I rode one of the horses I was petrified, the racing ones are huge. So it turned out being a jockey wasn't for me"_

Lee decided not to mention that the horse he rode was Red Rum. People tended not to believe him when he told them that, and he didn't want Lucy to think he was telling her a bunch of lies.

 _"Aren't you a bit tall for that anyway?"_

 _"Yeah probably. I spent most of my time there shovelling horse shit and cleaning them. It wasn't pleasant. A lot of people don't realise that you even have to clean their penis"._

 _"Ergh, I didn't know that. Now I wish I hadn't snogged that stable hand where I used to ride. If I'd known where he'd been I wouldn't have touched him with a barge pole"_

 _"Oh...well before you run off to talk to someone else I would like to point out that I've washed my hands a few times since then"_

Does that mean Lee's hoping I might touch _him_ , thought Lucy. No, she was probably reading too much into it.

 _"It's okay, I'm not planning on running off. You haven't told me about your best job yet"._

 _"That was definitely being a Bluecoat at Pontins. I organised and ran the sports competitions for the children. I even got a chance to go on stage once but I was so nervous I swore at a guest and got the sack"_

Lucy couldn't help but laugh then. She could just picture the scene.

" _Sorry, I shouldn't laugh"_

 _"It's okay, looking back it was pretty funny"_

 _"What did you say?"_

 _"A word that I wouldn't want to say in front of you"._

 _"Oh, that bad?"_

 _"Yep"._

" _You really have had an interesting range of jobs haven't you? Your CV must make fascinating reading. Mine basically consists of waitress and chambermaid. And I'm working as a barmaid at the moment. I hate it but at least it means I'm not completely dependent on my parents for money"._

 _"I bet you've still got some job related stories though"_

 _"Actually yes, especially from when I was a chambermaid. You wouldn't believe some of the things I'd find in those hotel rooms"_

 _"Try me..."_

...

 **January 2015. The McKillop house, near Hampton Court, Surrey.**

" _I remember Lee telling the Bluecoat story on the Graham Norton show"_

 _"Yes, he made John Cleese cry with laughter. He says that was one of his proudest moments ever. Making John Cleese laugh that is, not the Pontins incident. I had such a nice time talking to him at that party, he was lovely and fascinating. It made such a change from my usual conversations with boring and arrogant sales and banking wannabes"_

 _"What happened then, that night? Did you get together?"_ , Ellie enquired.

" _No, unfortunately the evening didn't end as I'd hoped"_

 _"How come?"_

 _"We continued to talk for ages, we were getting on really well, discussing our favourite TV comedy programmes and the like. It was immediately clear our backgrounds were very different but what we had in common was our love of and taste in comedy. The conversation had just started to become a bit more flirtatious when out of the blue my friend Emma reappeared in a complete state and practically dragged me out of the house"_

 _"Did you get his number?"_

 _"I didn't get the chance. I found out when we got home that Emma had walked in to one of the bedrooms and found her boyfriend having sex with Chloe. She'd dragged Chloe out of the bed and slapped her"._

" _I thought you said Chloe was a lesbian?"_

 _"Clearly she was bisexual. Anyway, because of what happened I wasn't invited to any more house parties there. I hoped I would bump into Lee again around the university but I didn't. Obviously there was no Facebook or anything in those days so I couldn't look him up. I just told myself it was obviously not meant to be. Before I knew it the term had ended and I assumed that was it. Lee would be graduating and I'd never see him again"_

 _"When did you see him next? Did you go to another one of his gigs?"_

 _"Yes, but not in London. I saw him in Edinburgh that Summer..."_


	3. Chapter 3

**Less than a week until the Christmas special, I can't wait! I'm hoping the show being on TV might prompt some more stories on here. There hasn't been many new on here for a while. I'd love to see some new writers on here, or the return of some old ones (pretty please). So, Lee Mack said on the One Show this week that a series 8 is definitely being discussed. He even said he is writing the first episode in case it goes ahead. Sounds very promising.**

 **Flashback. August 1995, Edinburgh.**

Lucy had wanted to go to the Edinburgh fringe festival for the last few years but her parents hadn't allowed her to go. This year, having lived away at University since September and having saved up enough money from her bar job, she had finally made it there.

Lucy and her friends Emma and Lilly were staying at a budget hotel within walking distance of the centre of the city. They'd managed to book the last two rooms in the hotel, Emma and Lilly sharing a twin room and Lucy, who had the most money to spend, had a double room to herself.

" _Here we are then, the Royal Mile. I think we should just walk around for a bit and get our bearings, maybe pick up some leaflets and see what shows we want to see"._

 _"Sounds like a good idea to me Emma, who's got the map?"_

 _"I've got it_ ", Lucy replied.

The three friends were immediately drawn into the atmosphere of the festival, the streets in the historic centre were buzzing and slightly chaotic. They made their way through the crowds of fellow festival goers, some looking slightly overwhelmed, others rowdy and still drunk from the night before. They passed the many street artists - jugglers, human statues, magicians, and were stopped every few metres by someone giving out leaflets to a show. A few hours later, with what seemed like hundreds of leaflets in hand, they stopped at a coffee shop. There were so many shows, now began the difficult choice of what to go and see.

They agreed that in the interests of spontaneity they would go and see a show this afternoon, but not decide before hand which, they would just walk around and see what shows still had tickets available or which venue they would be persuaded into as they walked past. Emma looked through the the flyers she was carrying.

" _Oh my God Luce! Have you seen this?"_

 _"What?"_

She passed Lucy the flyer. There was a picture of Lee McKillop on the front, only he was called Lee Mack. Lee from the Kings Arms, Lee from the disastrous us student party. Lee who she'd really liked and had found herself thinking about quite a bit in the last few months.

" _No way. Lee's here, doing a show? I don't believe it"_

 _"Who's Lee? Do you know him?"_ , Lilly asked, not aware of the encounter at the party back at Brunel.

" _I've met him. I didn't really spend enough time with him to get to know him properly unfortunately"._

Lucy explained to Lilly about the events of the party, and how her conversation with Lee had been cut short just as things were getting a bit flirty between them.

" _Right that's settled then, if there's still tickets available, we're going to see Lee tonight",_ Lilly concluded.

" _Just think, he might see you in the audience, and anyway we can hang around after the show and hopefully meet him"._

 _"I don't know, don't you think that might make me seem a bit stalky?"._

 _"No... and anyway, we can make it look accidental if we need to"._

 _"Okay_ ", Lucy agreed, knowing her friends wouldn't take no for an answer. She really wanted to see Lee again, but she was nervous. What if he didn't even remember her? What if he did remember her but had not wanted to see her again? She might have just imagined the spark that she had felt between them.

...

Lucy, Lilly and Emma had taken their seats in the venue and were waiting for the show to begin. The others noticed Lucy was being a bit quiet.

" _Are you okay Luce?"_

 _"Yeah, I'm fine. It's just...you know. I really liked Lee but I'm worried he just saw me as one more boring first year he was forced to talk to at a party"._

 _"Did he give you that impression at the time?"_

 _"No he was lovely and interested in what I had to say but..."_

 _"Then stop worrying. Ooh, here we go..."_

The lights dimmed, and Lee appeared on the stage.

Lucy was glad of the dim lighting, as she felt less exposed as she watched Lee perform. He was just as funny as that night at the Kings Arms, even funnier in fact. And just as handsome. No, he looked even better than she remembered. It had only been a few months but he seemed to have matured, grown into himself.

Straight away, he had the audience on side, and he seemed to own the stage. Almost everyone there was laughing from the first joke to the very last.

A little while into the show Lee caught Lucy's eye, and she could see there was recognition. He looked surprised to see her, but smiled when she gave him a small wave.

After the show finished the girls were getting up from there seats, putting their coats on when none other than Lee emerged from backstage and approached them.

" _Hi, I hope you don't mind me coming over but I recognised you. It's Lucy right? Lucy from Brunel? And I've met you too haven't I?...Emma isn't it?"_

 _"That's right"_

 _"I knew it"_

 _"I didn't know if you'd remember me. We only met briefly after all",_ Lucy added.

" _Too briefly. You got rudely taken away from me when we were in mid conversation. Some people just make lasting impression though don't they?"_

 _"Yeah they do_ ", Lucy smiled shyly at Lee as she replied.

Lucy's friends both suddenly felt like gooseberries.

" _Sorry, I'm being rude. I don't know you do I?",_ Lee addressed Lilly, not wanting her to think he was ignoring her.

" _No, I'm Lilly, pleased to meet you. You're very funny"._

 _"I'm Lee. And thanks, presuming you mean funny ha ha and not funny strange"_

All three laughed.

" _No I mean funny ha ha"._

 _"Phew...so, how long have you all been up here?"_

 _"Today's our first day"_

 _"Oh, and you chose to watch me on your first night, I'm flattered. Or was it because my show was the only one not sold out?"_

 _"No, we saw your flyer and remembered how funny you were. And of course we knew how much Lucy here wanted to see you again after that party so we..."_

Lucy elbowed Emma to try and shut her up. She didn't know where to look, she couldn't believe Emma had just said that in front of Lee.

" _Is that right? You wanted to see me again?"_

 _"Yes"._

 _"Lucy...I know you probably don't want to ditch your friends but would you like to come for a drink with me? You can all come along if you want. I just thought it would be nice to continue our conversation"_

 _"I'd love to. Lilly, Emma?"_

 _"It's okay, we won't tag along. Unless you want us to"._

Lucy shook her head.

" _Come on Lilly, let's go and find a club. We'll see you back at the hotel later Luce...unless one of us gets lucky_ ", Lucy blushed as Emma winked and elbowed her suggestively.

...

" _Here you go, one Bacardi and Coke"._

 _"Thanks Lee"._

 _"So...you wanted to see me again? Often the women I meet at parties go out of their way to avoid me afterwards"._

 _"I don't believe that for a minute. From what I've seen you're a lovely and friendly person"_

 _"Thank you. The thing is though, lovely and friendly as a first impression doesn't always appeal to women. And not all woman are lovely and friendly themselves, I've learned that the hard way"._

 _"You've had your heart broken?"_

 _"A few times. But I'm sure you don't really want to hear about my exes. I'll rather leave them in the past where they belong"_

 _"Fair enough"._

 _"Lucy...I've got a confession. After that party, I tried to find you. I approached your department at University but that didn't work. Firstly I didn't know your last name, and secondly I think they thought I was a stalker. The woman in the department office looked really suspicious"._

Lucy was shocked. Lee had actually tried to look her up, so he must have liked her as much as she liked him.

" _You really went to that effort, to try and see me again?"_

 _"Yes, is that weird?"_

 _"No I think it's sweet. I confess I thought about you quite a bit after we met, but because of what happened with Chloe I didn't have a way of getting your number. I hoped I'd bump into you around the university but never did. I never expected I'd bump into you here, not that going to see your show is bumping in to you. But before today I didn't even know you were up here performing. Is this your first time in Edinburgh"_

 _"Yes it is, performing anyway"._

 _"I thought the show was great, is it doing well?"._

" _Glad you liked it. The audiences have been appreciative so far. Tonight was the most tickets I've sold so far, so hopefully word's getting around. I'm probably losing money, but everyone does here, even the biggest acts"_

 _"Really, so why do they come here?"_

 _"The experience, the atmosphere, the chance to hang out with other comedians, plus the exposure. If you're lucky and get good reviews, it can be great for your career"_

 _"We looked a couple of your reviews this afternoon. You've got some good ones, one of them gave you five stars"._

 _"Really? I'll make sure I use that on my posters. So, did you see a show this afternoon?"_

 _"Yeah, a spur of the moment thing. It was a bit weird, a sort of avant-garde student production. It was supposed to be a comedy, but there wasn't much laughing going on. I sort of enjoyed it though, in a strange way"._

 _"All part of the Edinburgh experience, there's some totally out there shows. There was one where a guy just sat in silence and looked at the audience for an hour. And people paid for tickets to see it. It was actually quite successful apparently. I just wish I'd thought of it first. It would have saved me months of writing and trying out material"._

 _"Too right. I bet he got a few heckles though"_

" _I would imagine so, and he wouldn't have been able to put the hecklers down. If he'd broken the silence that would've spoiled the point of the show"._

 _"I must say I wouldn't have parted with my money for that. I know you probably don't get to see any shows yourself but do you have any recommendations, you must know who's good"_

 _"Bill Bailey is definitely worth seeing, there's Sean Lock, he's a really nice bloke too, Omid Djalili, Dara O Briain, Ed Byrne, Jenny Eclair if you can get tickets, she's tipped to win the Perrier award, Tim Vine's is meant to be really good, but our paths haven't crossed yet so I haven't seen him myself. I mean, there's loads, how long are you here for?_

 _"Just this week unfortunately"._

 _"That's a shame"_

 _"I know but we couldn't afford to stay any longer. The hotels cost a fortune around here"_

 _"I know, they hike up the price during the festival month. I'm staying in a flat with three other comedians. It's all a bit student digs, you know pot noodle sandwiches for lunch and cold leftover takeaway for breakfast. It's not exactly luxury accommodation"._

" _I shudder to imagine what you all get up to in there. A bunch of male comedians all living in a confined space. All that testosterone, and I bet you're all constantly trying to out funny each other"._

 _"There's a bit of that, I'm not going to lie. But we all get on really well. It's a laugh. I'm probably the most well behaved out of all of us, maybe it's because I lived with two women at university. I think they must have domesticated me a bit"_

 _"I'm not sure pot noodle sandwiches counts a domesticated"_

 _"Fair point, but I'm not as wild as the others. I'm a bit more Rick Astley than Mick Jagger, put it that way"._

 _Lucy was laughing now, "sorry, I'm just picturing you in eighties clothes and that funny little quiff thing Rick Astley had back in the day. I don't think it'd be a good look for you"_

 _"Well it's funny you should say that. I actually had a bit of a quiff years ago. I was in a band with some mates briefly back in Southport. I thought I looked really cool. In hindsight the whole look was a big mistake. Not as big a mistake as the perm though_ "

" _Oh, please tell me there's photos somewhere, it sounds hideous...no offence"_

 _"No, it was hideous, though at the time where I was from you weren't considered a real man unless you had a perm"_

 _"You just keep sticking to that story yeah. So, you were in a band, are you a frustrated rock star then?"_

 _"Not really. It was sort of fun, but I was so out of my depth. I can play the guitar a bit, but I'm really not the best singer in the world. Looking back we were pretty bad, though somehow we just about got away with it"._

 _"I don't know...musician, stable boy, bingo caller, children's entertainer, mobile DJ, hospital receptionist, fruit picker, stock room assistant... okay so maybe the last one doesn't sound as glamorous...but is there any job you haven't tried your hand at?"_

" _Yeah, soldier, sailor, tinker, tailor, data analyst, green grocer, postman, doctor"_

 _"I'm relieved to hear about the last one"_

 _"I can't believe I told you about all my jobs at that party, and I can't believe you can remember them all"._

 _"I listen to people. If what they have to say is interesting I tend to remember"._

 _"You think I'm interesting? Should I be flattered or offended?"_

 _"Flattered. I mean interesting in a good way, not in a psychological test subject sort of way"_

 _"Well, that's a relief to hear. I'd be very disappointed if I found out you only agreed to have a drink with me as research_ ", Lee feigned seriousness, then grinned, making Lucy giggle.

" _I assume you've finished your degree?"._

 _"Yes, I graduated last month"._

 _"So what's your plan now?"_

 _"I'm going to make a go of being a full time comedian. I'll keep my job for now but I'm hoping to be earning enough for the stand up to quit eventually. How about you, did you pass your end of year exams?"_

 _"Yes, and in September I'm going to Japan, to spend year there. It will be a mixture of studying at a university there and work experience"._

Lee's face fell noticeably when Lucy said she was going away. He tried to hide his disappointment,

" _So you finally get to travel"._

 _"Yes. A whole year though, I'm in two minds about it. I've been to a couple of Japanese language classes but I don't know that much. A whole year away, you know...it won't be like going on holiday. I'm really nervous"._

 _"You'll be fine. Just think of it as an adventure"._

...

The pair talked and talked until the barman called time.

" _I can't believe it's closing time. I've had a really nice time talking to you Lucy. Can I see you again?"_

 _"Yes, I'd love that"_

 _"Great. How about tomorrow? Or is tomorrow too soon?"_

 _"No. Tomorrows good for me"._

 _"I can take you sightseeing if you like"_

 _"Sounds lovely"_

 _"You're sure your friends won't mind that I'm taking you away?"_

" _They'll cope without me"._

 _"That's settled then. How about I pick you up from your hotel, shall we say ten thirty?"_

 _"Great. I'm looking forward to it"._

 _"Can I walk you home?"_

 _"I'd like that, thank you"._

...

" _So, this is me_ ", Lucy sighed as they reached the entrance to her hotel.

" _Okay...well. Thanks for a lovely evening. I'll see you tomorrow then. Goodnight Lucy"_

Lee smiled nervously, before leaning in and kissing her gently on the cheek. She placed her hand on his arm as he did, squeezing it slightly. He pulled away and their eyes met, neither wanting to look away. Lucy didn't want to say goodnight, but she knew she had to. She could hardly invite Lee in tonight, that would look too forward. There was something about him though. He gave her butterflies in her stomach. She felt excited about the prospect of spending more time with him.

" _Goodnight, Lee"._

Lucy smiled widely, then reluctantly turned away from Lee and pushed open the door of the hotel. She ran up the stairs to her room, unable to wipe the grin off her face.


	4. Chapter 4

**January 2015. The McKillop house, near Hampton Court, Surrey.**

" _I sat there for a couple of hours until my friends got back from clubbing. I just had to tell them how well the evening had gone. I can't imagine they were really that happy that I was abandoning them to spend the following day sightseeing with Lee but if they were annoyed they didn't show it.  
_

 _I couldn't sleep that night, I couldn't stop thinking about him, though there was something else playing on my mind. Japan. It felt like things might happen with Lee but I knew I was leaving the country the following month. In the end I just decided not to overthink it, to just enjoy spending time with him, you know...live in the moment".  
_

 _"So the next day, you went on your sightseeing date?"  
_

 _"Yes, we walked around the city together, just talking and taking in the sights. I still remember the moment he held my hand for the first time as we approached Edinburgh castle, the way I got whole of that first day together was perfect. I fell in love with Edinburgh, and even though I'd pretty much only just met him, I'd say that's also when I fell in love with Lee. And the end of our date was perfect"._

...

 **Flashback, Edinburgh, 1995**

" _What time have you got to be back for your show?",_ Lucy asked as they finished their coffees.

" _I need to be at the theatre by 7pm, so we've got plenty of time yet. There's somewhere else I'd really like to take you, I know you'll love it"_

 _"Where's that?"_

 _"Calton Hill. It has the most amazing views over the city"_

 _"Sounds lovely. Let's go then"._

...

Lee and Lucy stood at the top of the hill, still out of breath from the walk. Lucy smiled as she took in the panoramic view in front of them, then turned to Lee.

" _Thanks for bringing me here Lee. It's beautiful"._

" _Yeah it is"_ , he replied, looking deep into Lucy's eyes as he spoke, " _it's definitely worth the walk right?"_

 _"Definitely"._

 _"We can sit down and admire the view for a while if you like, there's a bench over there"_

 _"Sounds like a good idea, I need to rest my legs before we walk back down...oh look, quick we'd better run, there's another couple heading towards it"._

They won the race for the bench, giggling like children as they triumphantly sat down. Neither spoke for a few moments as their breathing got back to normal and their giggling died down.

" _Lucy_?", Lee sounded nervous.

" _Yes?_ ", she whispered back. They both stared straight ahead.

" _I..um...what do you think of Edinburgh then?_ ", Lee asked, not brave enough to say what he really wanted to say.

" _I love it"_ , Lucy replied quietly, reaching for Lee's hand, brushing her little finger against his. He covered her hand with his own.

They descended into contented silence then, just sitting, hands entwined for a few minutes, before Lucy spoke again, and they turned to face each other.

" _Lee?"_

 _"Hmm?"_

 _"This is going to sound really cheesy but I just wanted to say how much I've enjoyed today. Thanks so much for showing me all the sights"._

 _"It was my pleasure. I love spending time with you"._

 _"Same"._

Lee noticed Lucy was shivering. Even though it was summer there was a breeze that made it slightly chilly on the hill.

" _Are you cold? You're shaking"._

 _"Only a bit"._

 _"Here, have this_ ", Lee said, taking off his jacket it and draping it over Lucy's shoulders.

" _Thanks_ ".

The atmosphere around them was alight with electricity now. Ever since the moment they'd first held hands earlier today and he'd felt a charge run through his veins, Lee had been desperate to kiss Lucy. He knew he had to choose his moment though, and he was worried about misreading the signals and crossing a line. His eyes met Lucy's again, searching, trying to read her thoughts. He found her hand again, linking their fingers. Feeling the heat of Lee's gaze, and his thumb ever-so lightly brushing against her own, Lucy's skin began to tingle and flush.

" _Lucy...can I kiss you?"_

On hearing Lee's words Lucy's stomach did a somersault, and her pulse raced with anticipation, excitement, nerves. She could feel her throat become dry, but she managed to breathe her answer,

" _Y...yes...and you don't have to ask me"._

 _"It's just...I didn't want you think I brought you up here to pounce on you. I'm not one of those comedians who comes to the Edinburgh festival to get laid, because believe me they are out there_ ", Lee was babbling slightly, his nerves getting the better of him.

" _I can tell you're not like that. And I've been wanting you to kiss me all day, I wanted you to kiss me last night when we said goodnight"._

 _"Really?...you see I don't just go around kissing women without it meaning something, I'm to old for that malarkey...and..."._

 _"Lee, shut up. Just kiss me_ ". Lucy sounded slightly desperate now, and Lee could hear her breathing was as unsteady as his own.

Lee shuffled closer to Lucy until their knees were touching, their faces just centimetres away. They were so very close now, and it made him feel a little dizzy. For a split second her found himself just studying her, taking note of every freckle and dimple, swimming in the green of her eyes. Her noticed a strand of her hair fall across her face in the breeze, and tenderly brushed it away from her eyes. He watched her eyelids slowly flutter closed, then lowered his gaze to focus on her trembling lips.

Though her eyes were shut Lucy's other senses were heightened now. The hill was quiet, apart from the occasional passing aeroplane and bird singing, and now she could only hear the sound of their breathing and her own increasing heartbeat. She took a deep breath, inhaling the heady scent of Lee's cologne, of citrus and musk and masculinity.

Lucy felt Lee curl his finger under her chin and lift her head, then at last his lips touched hers. He merely grazed them at first, testing the waters. Then finally...finally he began to move his lips tentatively with her own. She responded immediately, sighing against his mouth as she relaxed, feeling herself seem to melt into him.

As the kiss deepened, Lee gently cradled Lucy's face with one then both of his hands. She mirrored his action, then one of her hands found its way to the back of his head, her fingers playing with the soft hair there. They were both lost in the moment as seconds, maybe minutes passed. Eventually they parted, their foreheads still touching.

" _Wow_ ", was all Lee could say for a second, his breathing uneven.

" _Yeah, I'd say that was a wow"_ , Lucy whispered, her voice slightly horse. It was fair to say that as kisses go, that had been pretty special.

They reluctantly moved from their position, turning to see the sprawling city below them again. It was strange to think of how busy the streets were down there, yet it was so quiet and still here, and right now it felt like no one else existed. Lee put his arm around Lucy, holding her close as she rested her head on his shoulder.

" _Do you want to stay here for a while, or should we start walking back?",_ she asked _._

 _"I want to stay here, but depending on what time is, we might have to go, I have get back for my show, sorry"._

 _"That's okay, you can't miss that. What time is it?"_

Lee looked at his watch.

" _Blimey, it's five thirty. Time really does fly when you're having fun. We are going to have to make a move I'm afraid. I think I've still got time to walk you back to your hotel though"._

 _"Are you sure?"_

 _"Yeah, I'll get a taxi to the theatre if I have to"._

 _"Come on then, we'd better get a move on"._

Lucy stood up and held out her hand. Lee took it and she pulled him up from the bench. Hand in hand they began the walk back down the hill.

...

They arrived at Lucy's hotel, stopping outside the front door. Lee placed his hand on Lucy's forearm.

" _Lucy...before I go there's something I want to say...I know we've not long met but there's something about you...when I'm with you I just feel happy. I'd really like to spend some more time with you, get to know you more, if you want"._

 _"I feel the same. What are your plans for tomorrow?"_

 _"I've got to go to an awards thing during the day. I'd invite you but we're not allowed to bring guests"._

Lucy felt a tinge of disappointment but she understood. The show and everything that went with it, that was why Lee was here in Edinburgh after all.

" _That's okay, I should probably spend some time with my friends anyway. They probably think I've abandoned them"._

 _"I've got the evening off tomorrow, I'm not doing the show. Would you like to have dinner with me? Perhaps we could go to a show first"._

Lucy grinned, " _I'd love that"._

 _"Great, I'll sort out some tickets, and a restaurant. Is there anyone in particular you want to see?"_

 _"I want to see Bill Bailey, some people I spoke to yesterday said he was really good...the only thing is he'll probably be sold out for tomorrow. But I trust your judgement, surprise me"._

 _"What sort of food is your favourite?"_

 _"I really don't mind, but Mediterranean maybe"._

" _Okay. Can I pick you up about six thirty? Lots of shows start around seven or seven thirty. I'll call you if it's any different"._

 _"Six thirty it is then. I'm looking forward to it"._

Lee smiled and nodded, " _me too"._

There was a pause for a moment as they got lost in each other's eyes again. They kissed, all too briefly, whispering a breathy 'goodnight' as they parted.


	5. Chapter 5

**January 2015. The McKillop house, near Hampton Court, Surrey.**

" _I spent the morning and afternoon the next day with my friends. It was nice but my mind was elsewhere. I couldn't stop thinking about Lee and that kiss, and was counting down the hours until I saw him again"._

 _"Ahh, the excitement of young love"._

 _"Yeah. But you know what...this is going to sound cheesy but I still get excited about seeing Lee when we've been apart...even after all these years"._

 _"You two are so sweet"._

 _"Lee probably doesn't feel the same. I think he quite enjoys a bit of quiet time away from me and the boys"._

" _Maybe but I bet he misses you"._

 _"Yeah he does"._

 _"I mean he texted you earlier to tell you to wait up for him, and that he loves you. I would say that means he's excited about seeing you and he's only been out for the day"._

Lucy nodded and smiled. She felt so blessed that her and Lee still had that kind of relationship. Of course, inevitably there were little things they did that annoyed each other, and the dynamics of their relationship had changed since they'd had the children, but unlike some married couples they knew they still fancied each other like mad, and were still as much in love as they had always been.

...

 **Flashback. Edinburgh, August 1995. 6.30pm outside the Thistle Hotel.**

Lee grinned as Lucy emerged from the hotel, noticing her eyes seemed to light up when she saw him.

" _Hi Lucy. You look lovely"._

 _"Thanks Lee...you're not looking so bad yourself_ ", she blushed and smiled shyly. " _So, what show are we going to see?"._

Lee pulled two tickets out of his pocket and showed them to Lucy. She looked delighted.

" _Bill Bailey's Cosmic Jam! How did you get hold of those? My friends tried to book tickets for his show but it was sold out"._

 _"I met him at the awards thing this afternoon, wangled two tickets"._

 _"Wow, thank you. That was nice of him"_

 _"He was a really nice bloke actually"._

 _"How was today anyway?"._

 _"It was good. It was really nice to meet some of the other comedians, we had a good laugh. I've been nominated for a 'so you think you're funny newcomer award'._

 _"Congratulations Lee! You deserve it"._

 _"Thank you. Oh...I meant to say I booked an Italian restaurant for after the show. Is that okay with you?"_

 _"Perfect"._

" _Right, let's go then"._

Lucy nodded and Lee took her hand as they started walking towards the city centre.

...

Lee and Lucy were still laughing as they walked from the show venue to the restaurant.

" _I'm assuming you enjoyed that then?"_ , Lee asked Lucy.

" _I did. It was hilarious. He's clearly a talented musician as well"._

 _"Yeah, the bastard. How is that fair?"_ , Lee laughed as he spoke.

" _Do I detect a hint of envy?"_

 _"Not really, I'm joking. I think he's brilliant"._

 _"I think you're just as funny anyway, and there's one thing you've definitely got over him"._

 _"What's that? My rugged good looks?"_

 _"You're on a date with me..."._

Lee pretended to look offended.

 _"...and your rugged good looks of course"_ , Lucy added with a grin.

...

Lee and Lucy enjoyed a lovely romantic meal at the restaurant. Lee had chosen well. The food was delicious, and the atmosphere was just right. The surroundings were elegant yet still comfortable and relaxed, the space busy yet still intimate. They got to know each other even more, talking and laughing as though they'd known each other for years.

...

Lee walked Lucy back to her hotel, and was about to say goodnight when she spoke,

" _I was wondering...do you want to come up for a coffee?"_. Lucy seemed slightly nervous as she gestured towards the entrance to the hotel.

Lee's heart skipped slightly. He took a deep breath.

" _I'd love to",_ was his reply.


	6. Chapter 6

Lucy found her hand was shaking as she put the key into the lock and opened the door of her room. She walked in, and Lee followed close behind her.

" _So...err...take a seat. I'll make the coffee"._

Lee looked around the room to notice there were no chairs. He sat down on the edge of her bed. There was silence for a few seconds, until Lucy turned around and spoke,

" _It's a bit of a cliche isn't it, inviting someone in for coffee?"_

 _"We are having coffee",_ Lee added.

Lucy abandoned the kettle and sat down next to Lee. He turned to face her and she dared to meet his gaze.

" _I know but that's not why I invited you up to my hotel room"_.

Lee gulped. Did this mean what he thought it did? He hoped but didn't want to assume.

" _So...w...why did you?"_

Lee noticed Lucy's expression change. Her eyes were sparkling with something, desire perhaps.

" _Why do you think? Lee...will you stay here with me tonight?_ ".

Lucy exhaled then, having held her breath for what seemed like forever. She'd never invited a man to spend the night with her before, but Lee was different. Still, as much as she wanted this, she was surprised she'd been brave enough to ask the question. Now that she had, she could only hope that Lee didn't think she was being too forward.

" _Lucy?_ "

Lee could feel his pulse racing now. His breathing was becoming uneven, and there were butterflies dancing in his stomach. He didn't know why he had just questioned Lucy, it was just that the situation had left him somewhat tongue-tied.

" _Don't get me wrong I don't want you to think I'm one of those festival groupies that throws herself at the nearest comedian. I'm not like that"._

 _"I didn't think for a minute that you were"._

 _"Good. I just feel like there's something special between us, though maybe you don't feel the same and..."_

 _"I do...feel the same_ ". Lee whispered, lightly running he tip of his finger over Lucy's hand then entwining his fingers with hers.

" _Thank God. So...do you want to...stay I mean?"_

 _"Of course I do, if you're sure?"_

 _"I'm sure_ ", Lucy replied, her voice barely a whisper now.

Hearing Lucy's words and seeing her nod, Lee smiled. He looked a little nervous but there was something else in his eyes that made her shiver with anticipation.

Lee oh so slowly inched towards Lucy, and she tried hard to steady her breathing as he brought his hand up to her face, tucking her hair behind her ear. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, suddenly aware that she was trembling.

" _Lucy...I want you so much_ ", Lee breathed as their lips almost, almost touched.

" _Want you too",_ Lucy somehow managed to murmur, her words all but cut off by Lee as he finally kissed her...

...

Things escalated fairly quickly, and before long Lucy was lying beneath Lee on the bed. She gasped as he slipped his hand under her top, stroking her skin, slowly moving his caresses up her body. His lips had moved from her mouth, mapping the skin of her neck and shoulders with kisses.

She was becoming more and more aroused and sure she could feel his growing hardness through his trousers.

When Lee began to unbutton her blouse, Lucy was suddenly overcome with nerves and doubt,

" _Lee...w...wait, I need...a minute"_ , she croaked, and Lee immediately stopped what he was doing, moving off her.

Without another word Lucy got up and headed straight to the bathroom, locking herself in. She stared at her reflection in the mirror and took several deep breaths, trying to calm herself down.

She started to curse herself then- she wanted this, wanted Lee so badly, so why had she stopped him? It was just that things had been moving so quickly, and even though the way Lee was touching her, surrounding her felt oh so good, it was also slightly overwhelming. It had been over a year since she had been this close to anyone. Lee had obviously been with a few women and she couldn't help but think about that. What if she didn't compare favourably to them? She did her best to shake any negative thoughts from her mind, telling herself that she was confident and could do this. Still, she was worried that her little panic might have put Lee off.

Lee sat for a few minutes, concerned about Lucy. The last thing he would ever want to do was upset her. He concluded that he should have asked before starting to undo her top, that he should have taken things more slowly. What if he'd ruined everything? Eventually, he knocked on the door,

" _Lucy, are you alright? I'm sorry if I upset you"._

Almost immediately he heard the bathroom door unlocking and Lucy emerged, walking back over to the bed. She sat down, leaning against the headboard, bringing her knees up to her chest.

" _Lucy, talk to me"_

 _"Sorry...I...I.."_

 _"You don't have to say sorry"._

 _"Come and sit back down...next to me"_. Lucy patted the space beside her and Lee did as she asked, settling back down on the bed.

" _Was I moving too fast for you? Because we can slow down, or stop"_ , Lee asked.

" _No. What you were doing, it felt really good"._

 _"Then what's wrong?"_

 _"I'm fine, I'm just...nervous. I feel a bit stupid now"._

 _"You're not stupid, and you don't have to be nervous around me, I'm not going to make you do anything you don't want to do. If it helps, I'm nervous too"._

 _"Really? You don't seem it"._

 _"I hide it well, like I do on stage"._

 _"It's just you've got all this experience, and I don't. Hardly any in fact"._

 _"Lucy...are you...are you a virgin?"_

Lucy felt herself blushing. She cleared her throat,

" _No but I've only...once. It was last year, with my ex boyfriend, Scott. He sort of pressurised me a bit, he didn't understand why I wasn't ready. Anyway, I gave in and it was clumsy and he wasn't exactly gentle and it hurt. He didn't make me feel good. It wasn't an enjoyable experience for me"._

Lucy already felt better now she had told Lee this.

" _Do you mean he didn't give you an orgasm?"_

 _"Lee I..."_

Lucy felt a bit out of her depth, all this talk of orgasms. Still, she felt comfortable with Lee, so she could be honest.

" _Sorry...was that too personal a question?"_

 _"No, it's okay. And...no he didn't...you know...give me an orgasm"._ Lucy could feel the heat rising up her neck, her cheeks.

" _Then he wasn't doing it right"_ , Lee whispered.

On hearing Lee's words, and his tone of voice, Lucy felt a bit breathless. She swore her heart was in her mouth.

" _Anyway, he upped and left the next day and I felt so used. I really thought he cared about me. I haven't liked or trusted anyone enough since to get that close to them. Until now that is"._

Lee could see the memory was painful for Lucy, and he took her hand, stroking his thumb gently against hers.

" _And the other thing is, what if I'm not very good at it? What if that's why Scott left?"._

 _"I really don't think you need to worry about that Lucy. It's far more likely that the reason Scott left is because he's an arsehole who didn't appreciate how special you are"._

 _"You think?"_

 _"Yes. Look, if we do this, I promise I'll still be here in the morning. But, we don't have to have sex. If you're not ready we won't"._

 _"I want to_ ", Lucy breathed, kissing Lee gently on the lips.

" _Are you sure? Because I can wait"_ , Lee spoke between kisses.

" _I'm sure, I really really like you, and I trust you"._

 _"If you want to stop at any point though, tell me, say the word. I don't want to do anything you're not comfortable with"._

 _"Thank you"._

 _"Don't be afraid to talk to me either, verbalise, tell me what feels good"._

 _"What if I'm too embarrassed?_ ", Lucy moved away from Lee slightly, opening her eyes again to look at him. Her eyes met his, and it reassured her.

" _Let yourself go. I want to know what feels good for you. I want you to enjoy this, I want to show you that sex is a wonderful thing"._

His piercing green eyes were darker now.

Lucy just smiled shyly then, as he leaned in again, stroking her cheek with the back of his finger before pressing his lips tenderly against hers...

...

 **January 2015, Surrey.**

" _I wish all men were like that",_ Ellie said to Lucy on hearing her recallections.

" _I know. He was so understanding"._

" _So did you do it that night?"_

 _"Don't tell Lee I'm sharing this, but yes we did, and he made it so special. He was so kind and gentle and considerate. And it was more than enjoyable, let me put it that way. Plus, he didn't abandon me the next day"_...


	7. Chapter 7

**Flashback. August 1995, Edinburgh**

Lee lifted his head from where it was buried in Lucy's shoulder, and kissed her forehead the her lips before reluctantly separating himself from her. Lucy sighed as Lee untangled their limbs and moved to lie beside her. He found himself unable to move from this position for a while, his heart still pounding, his breathing shallow and uneven, and smiled as he heard Lucy try to get her own breath back.

Eventually Lee rolled onto his side, propping himself up by his elbow. Lucy had one arm stretched out on the bed above her head, her face was flushed and her eyelids kept fluttering open then closed again. He couldn't take his eyes off her, grinning as he watched her body continue to tremble. After a while she turned her head to face him,

" _Are you staring at me?_ ", Lucy could feel Lee's eyes on her.

" _How could I not? You're beautiful"_

Lucy smiled shyly, " _thank you"._

 _"Are you okay?"_

 _"I'm more than okay. That was...amazing. I really wish my first time had been with you, that I hadn't been so stupid and wasted it on Scott"._

 _"Thanks Luce. Is it okay if I call you Luce?_

 _"Yes, I like it"_

 _"You know what, as bad as the experience with Scott was, don't beat yourself up about it. You weren't stupid, innocent maybe, but he was clearly a total bastard. Life's too short for regrets though, that's what my grandma used to say. Everything happens for a reason_ ". All the time Lee was dancing his fingers absentmindedly across Lucy's stomach, drawing patterns on her skin.

" _Quite the philosopher aren't you?"_

 _"Not really. I just mean, when something bad happens to you, you have to put it down to experience. Like when I got sacked from the job I loved at Pontins. I probably wouldn't be where I am now if that hadn't happened"_

 _"You know you said when you tell people you're a comedian they tend to judge you, think you're just about telling jokes. If only they knew you were so worldly wise"._

 _"Hey, a bit less of the worldly wise please, that sounds like you're saying I'm old!_ ", Lee had a twinkle in his eyes as he was talking, so Lucy could tell he was only teasing.

Lucy turned onto her side and rested her hand on Lee's hip. He wrapped an arm around her, and shuffled until their bodies were touching.

" _No...I mean there's more to you than just jokes. You have depths. And that's a good thing_ ". Lucy hooked her leg over Lee's, and found his hand, linking their fingers.

" _You still think I'm funny though right?"_

 _"Of course I do. Of all the men I've ever met you're definitely the most fun to be around. I genuinely think you're hilarious, you know that. You make me laugh all the time"._

 _"Apart from just now in the bedroom I hope. I love to make people laugh but when I'm bed with a woman, laughter's not really the effect I'm going for"._

 _"I thought it was obvious the effect you just had on me in bed. I've only just regained the power of speech. Believe me, now I understand what my friend Emma meant when she said older men were better lovers because they're more experienced"._

 _"Experienced? That's another way of saying I'm ancient right?",_ Lee teased, chuckling as he spoke.

" _That was supposed to be a compliment...I've got one question, what with you being so old and everything",_ Lucy grinned mischievously.

" _What's that?"_

 _"How tired are you?"_

 _"A bit. Only a bit_ ", Lee raised his eyebrow as he spoke.

" _Good, because I was just thinking I could use the benefit of your experience again"_

 _"Is that right?"_

 _"God yes"_ , Lucy's voice was faltering now.

" _In that case I'd be happy to help"_ , Lee's smiled seductively, then closed the gap between him and Lucy, kissing her passionately...

...

 **January 2015, the McKillop house, Surrey.**

" _I was due to go home at the end of that week, but Lee asked me to stay. I agreed, much to the anger of my parents. We spent the next two weeks all but barricaded in his room. Of course he had to go and perform in the evenings but that's when I caught up with sleep. We went to see the odd show together but apart from that we hardly left his bed._

 _Lee's show was really successful, and he won a prestigious award for new comics. All in all it was an incredible few weeks. I'd only known him for less than a month but I'd fallen for him hard. He told me years later that he'd been in love with me right from the start too, he just didn't have the guts to say it in case I didn't say it back._

 _Eventually...I had to go home, as I had to start getting ready to go away"._

 _"Of course, your year abroad"._

 _"All the time I was with Lee I tried to forget I was going to Japan, as I couldn't bear the thought being so far away from him. I even thought about not going, even though that would have meant quitting my university course"._

 _"Your parents would have killed you"._

 _"Yes, and it was Lee, showing his worldly wise side again, that made me realise I had to go. He reminded me of the time I said how much I wanted to travel, said I'd regret not going, and he didn't want to be responsible for that. He was right, of course, and we promised to keep in touch, but it was so hard saying goodbye at the end of the Summer"_.


	8. Chapter 8

Sorry I haven't updated much recently, I've been so busy with other stuff. This is just a really short chapter but I'm hoping to update a few more times in the next couple of weeks as may have a bit more time.

...

" _So was it a whole year before you saw him again?"_

 _"Yes. He wasn't earning enough to afford to come out to Japan. We kept in touch while I was abroad, but it was difficult -there was the time difference for a start. Lee quit his job and became a professional comedian, and he was getting more and more busy, travelling around the country doing gigs. When I came home we met up and at first it was like we'd never been apart, and we had so much to catch up on..."._

" _You said at first, what happened?"_

 _"Lee was doing the Edinburgh festival again that summer and I couldn't go to Scotland with him because of work and family commitments. We talked whenever we could but it was hard not being able to see each other. Then I started my final year of university and found the more time I tried to spend with Lee the more my studies suffered. He was away a lot, and our lives were moving further and further in different directions. I still loved him, but we decided that maybe this just wasn't going to work, that it wasn't the right time for either of us to be in a serious relationship. We agreed to stay friends though, and we did text and speak on the phone regularly for a while. I missed him desperately, and even though it got easier with time, I never stopped thinking about him. Anyway...eventually the texts and calls got less and less frequent, and eventually they stopped. I saw him on television, it must have been in about 1997, on a comedy programme called Gas, he was hosting. I texted him to congratulate him but he didn't get a reply. I assumed Lee had met someone else, or just didn't want to keep in touch anymore"._

 _"Had he, met someone else?"_

 _"He'd had a couple of brief flings but nothing had come of them. He told me when we eventually found each other again that he'd lost his phone and never had my number written down"._

 _"What about you, did you meet someone else?"_

 _"Not for a while. After I finished university I threw myself into my career. I got a graduate placement in recruitment, then decided to do a Masters degree. Studying plus having a full time job didn't really leave me time for a boyfriend. There was a guy, Jack, from my office. We went on a few dates and things got a bit more serious, but the relationship eventually fizzled out. I never loved him, I think I just needed someone, you know for the company. And I was trying to move on I suppose. I didn't want to stay single forever"._

 _"When did you and Lee reunite then?"_

" _A year or so after I split up from Jack I finally finished my Masters degree. As well as passing my degree I had some more good news. I'd been given the opportunity to spend a few years in America as part of my job. I had a couple of weeks holiday so I decided on a whim to go up to the Edinburgh festival. I hadn't been for four years, not since the time I first got together with Lee"._

 _"Was he there performing?"_

 _"Yes, he was doing a sketch show with Catherine Tate and Dan Antopolski. I didn't plan to go and see him though, I thought it would be too painful, and that it might look like I was stalking him or something if he saw me at one of his shows. I actually bumped into him and some fellow comedians in a cafe..."_


	9. Chapter 9

**Just a short chapter. I apologise for the long hiatus with this story. I've been having a bit of writer's block with this one.**

 **...**

 **1999\. A cafe on Princes Street, Edinburgh.**

Lucy was sitting drinking coffee, reading through a pile of leaflets, trying to decide which show she wanted to see, when she suddenly heard a familiar voice, one that made her heart race. She felt nervous, worried that if it was Lee, and they saw each other, it would be awkward or painful. She turned around, wondering if she had imagined it.

" _Lucy?"_

Lucy's mouth fell open. It really was Lee. She couldn't help herself from grinning then, all of the nerves fading away when she saw he looked pleased to see her too. She'd fantasised about this, bumping into him by chance in some cafe or shop, but she didn't think it would actually happen. She stood up to greet him,

" _Oh my god, Lee!"_

They hugged, neither seeming to want to break their embrace. Feeling Lee's arms around her, her own holding him tight, Lucy was taken aback at just how happy and comfortable she felt.

They finally let go of each other.

" _How are you? You look well_ ".

Lee almost found himself saying 'you look lovely', but realised that would probably be inappropriate. She did though, look lovely. He still thought about Lucy, often, still missed her, even after all this time.

" _I'm really well, you?"._

 _"Yeah. It's good to see you"._

 _"Why don't you come and sit down, have coffee with me, if you want. Unless you're too busy"._

Lucy watched a red haired lady and a dark haired man approach Lee as she spoke. He was with friends.

" _No, I'm not. I've got time for a coffee. Lucy, this is Catherine and Dan. Lucy's an old...friend of mine. We've just bumped into each other"._

 _"Okay, shall we see you back at the theatre the Lee, let you two catch up"._

 _"Okay, see you later"._

Lee pulled up a chair and sat down next to Lucy.

" _So, how have you been?"_

 _"A lot's happened since I last saw you. I graduated, did a Masters degree. I'm working in recruitment now"._

 _"Are you enjoying it?"._

 _"Yeah, it's challenging sometimes, but I like it. I've seen you on TV a few times, I always knew you'd make it"._

" _Thanks. It's probably a bit soon to say I've made it though. I think I've got a long way to go yet"_

 _"Don't be so modest"._

 _"Are you here with friends?"_

 _"Actually I came here on my own, it was a bit last minute"._

The truth was Lucy had known Lee would be at the festival. She'd been thinking about him recently, and although she wasn't planning on seeking him out, perhaps this was what had made her decide on the spur of the moment to come.

" _So that woman, the red haired woman you were with...Catherine, is she your...?"._

Lee chuckled at the thought. Catherine would have thought the suggestion that they we together was hilarious. They were good friends, but that's all it was.

" _Catherine not my girlfriend. We're doing a sketch show here together, with Dan. I don't have a girlfriend"._

 _"Oh right"._ Lucy tried to hide how glad she felt about that.

" _So, how about you? I expect some lucky bastard's snapped you up"._

 _"No. I'm single"._

 _"Good. Sorry, I didn't mean...well, I did, but..."_

Did Lee really just say that? Lucy was pleased he had, but could see he felt awkward, so decided to make light of it.

" _Good? I haven't had sex for two years. It's starting to drive me mad. Sorry, you really didn't need to know that"._

 _"Maybe I didn't but I'm glad you told me. Since we're being honest with each other, if it makes you feel better I haven't had sex for a long time either"._

 _"Really? I assumed there'd be girls throwing themselves at you, what with you having been on TV and everything"._

 _"Not really, and I wouldn't be interested anyway. I'm not a one night stand sort of man"._

'And I wouldnt find anyone that came close to to you', Lee added in his mind. He didn't dare say it though.

" _Lucy?"_

 _"Yes?"_

 _"I know this is selfish but I am pleased you're single. I can't lie, even after all this time the thought of you with someone else makes me jealous"._

 _"Same"._

There was silence for a few moments then, as they looked at each other, their eyes trying to read each other's thoughts as they processed what had just been said.

" _Why did you stop replying to my texts?"_

Lucy knew she probably sounded like the clingy ex-girlfriend but she genuinely wanted, needed to know.

" _I had my phone stolen and lost your number along with it. I didn't know how to contact you. I felt awful, I would have kept in touch"._

 _"Oh. All this time, I thought you were ignoring me on purpose"._

 _"Of course not. I know we weren't together by then, but I still wanted us to be friends"._

 _"I've missed you"._

Lee looked up from his coffee. Those words meant a lot to him.

" _I've missed you too"._


End file.
